Swinger's New Year's Eve Gala Affair

If you are a swingers living in Minnesota, Wisconsin, Iowa or even Lower Ontario, come check out the hottest New Year’s Eve Party around, Wednesday, December 31, 2008, 7pm to 1am. We expect sensual revelers from all over to be in attendance. For more details about grand event, visit http://GalaAffair.com .

Britain on top in casual sex league

According to an article in a local British newspaper, "BRITISH men and women are now the most promiscuous of any big western industrial nation, researchers have found."

It would have been interesting to find out how many of them actually have multiple partners at the same time and would consider themselves swingers.

Nevertheless the paper went on to report that British men maybe more promiscuous than men.

To read more, click here.

Get your girlfriend into swinging

I just came across this book that tells you how to get your girlfriend into swinging. It probably could work for you wife also if you're interested in the swingers lifestyle. To read more, please click here.

Secret Orgasm

Iowa fans busted having sex

According to several newspaper articles, Iowa fans attending a game at the Metrodome in Minneapolis recently were busted having sex in the bathroom. To read more about the story, click here.

What's going on in Cap d'aAge?

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Free Sunday Social Party in Hinckley, Sunday, November 30, 2008

That’s right; it’s that time again for the Sunday Social, Sunday, November 30, 2008, 8pm to Midnight at a local bar in Hinckley. This is a fun time to join us to sing Karaoke, laugh, and meet great people (also they have food available). There is absolutely no charge to attend this gathering if you are a member of AttractionUSA.com or FriendshipExpress.com. Just go to FriendshipExpress.com add your name to the list of people attending, show up, look for us and let the party begin.

Hotels in the area are the Grand Casino Hinckley Hotel, Grand Hinckley Inn and the Grand Northern Inn. All of these hotels are within one block to a mile from this local bar and they will shuttle you to the Lounge. The number to make reservations with Grand Casino is 800-468-3517.

If you have any questions, please drop us a note, if not, we’ll see you there!

Swingers Passion Valentine Fantasy Party, Saturday, February 14, 2009

Even though this is a Valentine's Passion Party, you can wear whatever color that turns you on; many ladies like to wear Red, then that's fine with us. The mixture of Pink, Red, Black and White Outfits will add elegance and class to the evening.

We'll start the night out with Orientation for new attendees at 7pm followed by a sumptuous hors d'oeuvres and social at 8pm and then the dance from 9pm to 1am. Because this event is for couples and ladies only, we'll have an after hours Valentine's PJ/Lingerie Party from 1am to 5am (or until the last person leaves). So wear that cute Valentine's teddy, nightie, lingerie or pajama and let the evening happen.

This fantastic event will be held a lovely hotel in just north of downtown Minneapolis. Rooms are available at a reasonable rate of only $80 per night, so there is no need to worry about driving back home; you may get comfortable and have a fun night with long time friends and lots of new one.

For more details and to register, visit PinkPassionParty.com.

Swingers visit Hedonism II in Jamaica, March 2009

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Judge issues injunction against so called Super Bowl of Swingers Party

A Superior court just has canceled the controversial Flesh and Fantasy Halloween Ball, billed on the Internet as the super bowl of swingers' parties.

County officials scrambled into court this morning successfully arguing for a temporary restraining order against tonight's bash saying last year's party entailed a host of illegal activities, naked women and a traffic nightmare.

To read more click here.

Cherry Pit Trial in Texas

Meet Swingers Today

Jurors have found a Duncanville man accused of operating an unlicensed sexually oriented business from his home guilty on all 10 counts.

It's been fascinating following this story on this so called swingers club in Texas.

To read more, click here.

Swingers in Egypt?

Swinger's New Year's Eve Party in Minnesota

Egyptian police have arrested a senior civil servant and his wife accusing them of swapping sex partners with other couples, local media reports say.

To read more, click here.

Wife swapping in Italy

Think twice before you accept a dinner invitation from a loving Italian couple when holidaying in Italy, for along with dinner you might be served an offer to swap your partners.

From what is being reported by La Stampa newspaper in Italy, a quarter of all Italian couples regularly take part in wife swapping.

According to their article titled, 'The Lunch Time Swingers', almost 500,000 Italian couples are officially swapping partners at private sex clubs, and thousands more doing it in a more ad-hoc fashion in car parks, specially designated beaches or even cemeteries.

The report said that wife swapping had increased at a dizzying rate everywhere, and a major reason behind this predilection can be attributed to the internet which has apparently stripped away the taboos.

To read more, visit here.

Swingers: www.SwingLifeStyle.com

Two First Timers (And Lifestyle Virgins!) Visit To Two Creeks

As we took the Sandstone exit for our first visit to Two Creeks, we were both excited and nervous. The 18 miles out into the country seemed to last forever; the fireflies dancing before our headlights competing with the butterflies in our stomachs.

Brand new to The Lifestyle, we were attracted to Two Creeks by the fun, lively events advertised. This weekend was to be no different - described as “Trailer Trash” and our ‘new’ vintage camper seemed to fit the bill.

On arriving, we met Toni and Glen and were warmly directed to our campsite. Glen patiently helped us back into our home for the weekend, though the Friday night dance was already underway and undoubtably required his time.

With a fire circle, ice, wood, electricity and water close by, we were soon settled in. Did we have the courage to leave the safety of our camper and venture out to the Bare’s Den? What should I wear? What should we do? Were we too young, too old, too fat, too thin, too poor, too...? Catchy dance music lured us - I grabbed a bunch of glow bracelets and laser lights for ice breakers - and we made our way to the soft lights of the pavilion.

Within minutes some of the friendliest people we had every met came up to warmly, but not pushily, greet us. Everyone had a laugh with the glow jewelry, and my partner and I danced together more than we had in ages.

The next day, we toured the grounds, met more great people, and decorated our campsite for the “Trashiest Lot” contest. We potlucked our kabobs with other campers, finding that food not only tastes better outdoors, but when shared with new friends.

Always enjoying a chance to be silly and wear a costume, we had a blast at the next night’s dance and karaoke. The getups were hilarious, and even more was the witty, tongue-in-cheek attitude of all involved. (Or maybe tongue in... Oh, never mind!)

Prizes were awarded, with some taking home the coveted Marker-On-Wood-Plank awards. After the party ended, we invited folks to our campsite for an acoustic singalong, the familiar tunes rising up towards a sky peppered with stars. What a perfect end to a weekend!

But we were in for one more surprise - people did not pack up and leave on Sunday morning, but stayed on, drinking coffee or libations, setting up a chaise lounge “Nude Roadblock”, and regaling each other with funny stories from the night before.

As at other events during the weekend, lots of the women were taking full advantage of the soft summer sun with their tops off. While both my partner and I had much enjoyed this beautiful sight, did I have the courage to do it too? Before I could talk myself out of it, I pulled off my tank top, laying it close by in case of some imaginary emergency.

Before we left, we had arranged to leave our camper at Two Creeks for the entire summer, and many of our new friends were kind enough to “Welcome Us Home”. On later visits, we have been privileged to meet other first timers, and try to extend to them same “Two Creeks Welcome” that we enjoyed.

Now, the 18 miles from Sandstone still seem long, but only from anticipation of the wonderful times ahead, right down the road. And - I’m not sure if I ever did find that tank top again!

by TrailerTrash nickname on FriendshipExpress.com

Swingers have rights too...

Come join us at a Swinger's All Club Bike Weekend Party, August 15 - 17, 2008

Swingers have rights, too
RICHARD POLLARA

June 30, 2008

Toronto -- I woke up last week to find our club Menage a Quatre (an on-premise swingers club) in the middle of a media firestorm. Toronto councillor Mark Grimes had convinced city council to pass a resolution requiring city staff to look for ways to shut us down. Never mind that the licences we hold were legally obtained; never mind that our club is so discreetly located that, unless you know the exact location, you wouldn't know the club existed.

To read more about this article, click here.

Suspected swing club in Florida under scrutiny

The Hunt Club, a reported swinger’s club in Melbourne, FL is under scrutiny by the local authority. According to reports by a local news media, the Hunt Club operates out of Melbourne’s Oak Grove Acres subdivision. Many of the neighbors have voiced opposition to such activities.

Obama’s Success Linked to Swinger’s Club

Obama’s Success Linked to Swinger’s Club

by BOB HANNAFORD of TESSNBOB

Author's Note: We would never publicly identify anyone that has ever attended any of our events, but the information in the following article was already made very public.

It's funny how things affect other things. Sometimes a simple occurrence can influence a bigger occurrence. Then that influences an even bigger occurrence... and so on and so forth until the effect is huge. This is what happened when one particular couple decided to check out our swinger club. Who would have known at the time the set of events that this visit would start in motion... events which may very well ultimately be felt around the world.

To read more visit here.

Orlando Swinger Party Upsets Soccer Parents

Some teenage soccer players and their parents saw more sights than they wanted when they stayed at a hotel where about 200 swingers were having a New Year's party.

Paul Camporini brought his wife, seventh-grade daughter and eighth-grade son from Safety Harbor and said he had to "delicately explain to my Catholic school children that swingers change partners during the evening."

"My biggest gripe is that the hotel had two distinctly different groups under the same roof," said Camporini, 49. "A soccer team and middle-aged swingers should not have been booked together."

To read more, click here.

72 Year host of swingers party plead guilty

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Six people arrested at swingers party in Wichita

Five women and one man were arrested for performing sex acts just after midnight Sunday at a west Wichita club. Click to read more.

Frequently asked swinger's questions

Question: What sort of people are Swingers?

Answer: Swingers are interested in sexual adventure. Since the desire for sexual gratification is inherent to the human race, Swingers come from all walks of life, in all shapes and forms. She may be that attractive blond on the beach, or he may be your doctor, or they may be the couple next door.

Question: How do I approach my partner about Swinging?

Answer: There are two ways to go. The first is frank discussion - if your partner is able to verbalize his or her sexual desires, then talking and finding out the facts together may lead you to the decision that is best for your overall happiness. If it is difficult to find out exactly what your partner thinks, a less subtle approach may be better. Try exposing your partner to the idea of Swinging through verbal fantisizing during lovemaking, viewing pornographic movies and magazines that portray multiples, becoming platonic friends with Swingers, etc. By contacting local Swingers Clubs, you will be able to find out about discos and hotel lounges that are meeting places for couples interested in Swinging. A visit for dinner and drinks may lead to contacts and discussions that may spark your partner's interest in a new form of sexual adventure!


Question: I think I am interested in a Swinging experience, but am not 100% sure. This makes me a little uncomfortable, what should I do?

Answer: Research the topic more in depth. Once all the facts are in front of you, the decision will be a little easier. Like anything else in life, the first time may be a little uncomfortable because you have not participated in the activity before and do not know what to do. This is perfectly normal. Contact a local Swingers Club and explain your interests. You will more than likely be speaking with someone who knows exactly where you are coming from because he (she) was in your position at one time. They should be able to offer advice, contacts to speak with or meet, and places where you can go to socialize with Swingers on a platonic basis. This should give you exposure to the Swing Scene without any sexual involvement on your part.

Question: I want to be very discreet in my activities. What are the different ways to make contacts with other individuals / couples interested in Swinging?

Answer: Established Swingers Clubs are very professional and discreet in their conduct. Otherwise, they would not exist for more than a week. Other alternatives are Swinger publications and contact magazines / newsletters, computer bulletin board services for Swingers, Introduction Services, conventions and special events, travel agencies and resorts that cater to the sexually adventurous, and telephone contact organizations that offer voice mail advertisement and responses as well as chat lines.

Question: How can I maintain my privacy while corresponding with other Swingers?

Answer: You should be able to maintain a P.O. Box at a local post office for a nominal fee. In this way, you can remain anonymous at your leisure. Swinging activities can take place at third party locations: Swingers Clubs, hotels, resorts, private homes, etc., attend a swinger's event such as SwingStock or join an online site such as FriendshipExpress.com.


(c)1987 - 2008 Aspire, Inc. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, transcribed, stored in a retrieval system or translated into any human or computer language in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, magnetic, optical, chemical, manual, or otherwise, without the express written permission of the author or Aspire, Inc., PO Box 581515, Minneapolis, MN 55458.

email:The Club Social Directors

Sex Swingers As Seen By Naomi Harris

Sex Swingers As Seen By Naomi Harris

Most Europeans see the United States under the ultra-conservative administration of George W. Bush as a prudish country, where millions of citizens are outraged by a fleeting glimpse of singer Janet Jackson’s nipple during a live TV broadcast, where there is an ongoing struggle to ban the teaching of Darwin’s theory of evolution in schools, where exhibitions featuring provocative works are censored, and where a growing number of young people voluntarily maintain sexual abstinence before marriage. However, there exists a different United States – a country of a flourishing pornographic industry, a United States of sex clubs behind whose doors the wildest erotic dreams are made reality, a United States of millions of swingers, people who swap sexual partners and voluntarily have sex in front of an audience at a variety of parties and camps.

It is this part of America that the thirty-four year old Canadian photographer Naomi Harris depicts in her cycle Swingers, which is to be brought out in book form in 2008 by the renowned Cologne publishers Taschen, with a foreword by the famous US artist Richard Prince. In 1997 Naomi Harris, a graduate of art and psychology at York University in Toronto, enrolled in a nine-month course of photojournalism and photographic documentary at the International Center for Photography in New York, and since that time she has lived in America’s largest city, where she makes a living largely from photographic work for a variety of periodicals – her pictures have been published for instance in the New York Times Magazine, Newsweek, People, Sports Illustrated, Out, and Vanity Fair; in 2001 she was short-listed for the Eugene Smith Award. Alongside work on commission she also pursues her own work, mostly portraits and documentary projects. Among the best of those is her cycle Haddon Hall, capturing the inhabitants of a hotel of that name in Miami Beach, who are spending their retirement years under the Florida sun. Her sharply colored images are unflinching in showing the wrinkled skin, thick layers of make-up and affected smiles, and yet the cycle does not come across as sarcastic or mocking, since the artist’s sympathy for these people who do not give in to infirmity and old age, instead wanting to enjoy life to the full, is palpable.During her sojourns in Miami Beach, which she revisited over the course of two and a half years, Harris began taking photographs at the local nudist beech, becoming alive to the fact that even the most banal activities when conducted by people stripped of their clothes often look comical. This she later confirmed in her most extensive cycle so far, Swingers. The exchange of sexual partners and group sex at various swingers parties, swingers conventions, or Miss Swingers USA or Canada, are more widespread than most local citizens suspect – according to the North American Swing Association there are around three million swingers in America. Many of those live neither in Manhattan nor in Hollywood, but in somnolent suburbs, among regular, middle class folk. As Naomi Harris describes them thus – they are your schoolteachers, your doctors, your bank clerks, your cops. They are not perverts or porn stars. You pass them every day in the supermarket, on the highway, in an airport, in the post office line. These very same inconspicuous and ordinary people every now and then leave their kids at home and set out on wild parties and weekend revelries, where they realize their sexual longings with a number of different partners.Looking at these people, often neither young nor attractive, as captured by Naomi Harris in situations evoking scenes from porn films, we may ask how is it possible that the photographer ever gained their consent to be photographed and even have the images published. Though most swingers are possessed with a powerful degree of exhibitionism, many – and in the vast majority the younger ones – in fact refused to be photographed. Sander-like in composition, the portraits of the people in the center of the image staring directly into the camera are reminiscent of the photographs of Diane Arbus, incidentally an artist whom Naomi Harris holds in great respect. The people in front of the camera believe they look attractive and dignified, while in fact they strike the viewer as bizarre, grotesque, and often also desperately lonely. This impression is frequently assisted by their ridiculous costumes, designed to gain attention at theme-oriented parties. Even more absurd, however, are the images of various sexual acts, in which the artist pointedly juxtaposes parallel actions (e.g., a supine woman is being orally aroused, while another woman looks on, cleaning her teeth), or action and environment (sexual revelry in a swimming pool with a floating plastic duck). The people in front of the camera know that it is there, yet they ignore its presence; so great is the trust that Naomi Harris has succeeded to win, and so scant is their sense of shame, overridden by their pride in their sexual prowess and ability to carry out the wildest of fantasies. The visual qualities of Swingers also play an important role, with their imaginative use of color and natural lighting, as well as compelling composition, which often present but a fragment of the dramatic action, leaving wide open space for imagination. Naomi Harris claims that in her photographs she does not want to pass judgment, merely to document this fast growing yet so far little publicly presented phenomenon of contemporary American life, so full of sexual gymnastics, and so devoid of eroticism.

Vladimír Birgus FOTOGRAF 10/2007

Man Sues Swinger Web Site

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Women and swinging!

How many of us ladies came up to our partners one day with a copy of a swinger’s magazine and said “honey, doesn’t this look fun? Let’s get into Swinging!!!’ I didn’t think so. As my husband Glen and I have always said over the years... for the most part, it is the man that brings up the issue, but it is the woman who keeps the couple involved. After we go through thinking that we are not loved, not sexual enough or that he is just a dog, we discuss it further.

Why do we go through this? Well to start, women are not brought up to know the beauty of sex! We were blessed with these soft, sensuous, wonderfully sensitive bodies and then told the feelings they give us are bad. We were told not to enjoy them with each other and not even with ourselves (can you smell the fire and brimstone?). We were brought up that sex is only for procreation and/or when our husband comes home drunk or just demands sex. (Of course, not all men are like this, I am using this as an example.) Aren’t you glad you don’t have to live like that?!

Acceptance of ourselves and our bodies is a process of UNLEARNING all the negative gobbledegoop we were taught. We had to learn that sex is not something to be ashamed of and that those wonderful tingling sensations are good and NORMAL. If we find ourselves admiring another man or woman and the vibration starts, don’t worry, we are not possessed by Satan; we are feeling a normal human reaction. Yes, it’s OK to admire that gorgeous guy across the room. In fact, you can talk to him, dance with him and take it as far as you like.

The wonderful thing is that once we have gone though the myriad of changes, we find that we experience a freedom of unparalleled boundaries!!! We no longer see it as our partners not being happy with us, but as a growth experience for both of us. Our partners probably notice a change also. Women who were shy and timid, slowly come out of their shells and become more confident and assured of themselves. Your personal sex lives get even steamier as you talk about the possibilities and later the experiences you have. This Community empowers women!

Of course, we sometimes find that our partners get a little mixed up as we blossom. Usually the men come into swinging with visions of nubile nymphs, all calling his name. The fact is that most men cannot compete with women. Most men can only cum so much and then they have to rest. Whereas, women can be multi-orgasmic! You may be at a party and he is spent and you are still ready to rumble! There he sits, with a limp dick and hurt feelings because you may not be ready to go. Compromise and discuss your partners feelings, because, this is a feeling he probably did not anticipate having. Grow together!! Communicate! Communicate!! Communicate!!!

Ladies, you are the glue that holds this community together! You don’t believe it?! Picture a swinger’s dance, house party, or convention without women.... Now we are not saying this for you to put on a crown and armor, declare yourself Zeena, Queen of the Penis and tell your partner to feed you grapes (unless you both enjoy it, if that’s the case, may we suggest unseeded grapes)! It’s just a fact!!! This is a Queen’s Court. You, as a woman, have the opportunity to live, laugh and UNLEARN all of the negative things we were taught as children.

So ladies… don’t feel as if you were dragged into this community by some bizarre horny toad of a man who is only out for himself. Remember, he was caring enough to mention this to you. Married “single” swingers, if you would only take the time to caringly discuss this issue with your wives, you may not have to sneak out of the house with a lie. We say “may” because nothing is absolute and this lifestyle is not for everyone. But if you communicate with your partner and show her that this is not just for you, but for her also, you could be on your way to a wondrous journey together. No hiding, no shame, no lies, no guilt! Think about it! The truth will give you freedom.

Yes, the man is usually the one who brings up the subject, that is because men are brought up less sexually repressed than women. But it is the woman, who ultimately has the final say. Embrace this power ladies. Do not use it to hurt, use it to enhance. We live in a wonderful world filled with beautiful people. Sex is normal, sex is good. Once you take those small steps to sexual freedom, you will find your partner and you experiencing a journey together that is unparalleled by anything that the “straights” enjoy. The total freedom to enjoy the mutual satisfaction of another person if you so desire. The warmth, the mental stimulation and the red hot passion. It’s all there for us, just waiting for us to conjure the love and understanding that we all have. Breathe it in and enjoy life!!!

I will close with this joke…
At 7pm a husband brings his wife to a swing party, kicking and screaming. At 7am, the next morning, the woman is dragged from the swing party, kicking and screaming!

We welcome your feedback. You can write to us at toniglen@friendshipexpress.com or visit our other blog ToniGlen.com. While you're at it, a good way to meet swingers is to visit http://friendshipexpress.com/ .

What is The Swinging Lifestyle?

WHAT IS THE SWINGING LIFESTYLE?
By Shirley SezS. & R. Productions

The Swinging Lifestyle is as Multifaceted, as life and people are? It's Basic belief is that EVERYONE, has the right to live, love and enjoy themselves sexually;---providing there is MUTUAL CONSENT between adults. This is the only area, that we all think alike!!! It is from this pointion, we all differ about what the Swinging Lifestyle means to us and on what level, we choose to enjoy it's benefits.

The Swinging Lifestyle has been in existence since time began. Because on it's most basic level, the word "swinging" is only a board term meaning; the sharing of sexual pleasure with a person or persons we are not legally married to!!! In this context; most of the people in the world today, ARE swinging, whether they realize it or not!!!

The word "Swinging" derived from a Minister, who told his congregation, there were weird people who were swinging back and from bed to bed, in thesame manner as Monkeys. He seemed to think the people we spoke about were doing something new, different and weird but he was very wrong!Even in Jesus' time it was the common and acceptable behavior for the wealthy and powerful to have many wives, concubines and slaves for their sexual pleasure!!! Several women rulers availed themselves of their power also, by keeping an Equal number of male slaves and consorts to satisfy their sexual needs and desires too. So, what is being considered as new and weird conduct in our present unenlightened sexually controlled and somewhat puritan thinking work has been considered normal and even acceptable conduct for many people civilization and religions since time began!!!

Most European & Asian countries: Africa, Iran, Egypt, China and Japan, were among those that have lived in this manner for centuries and some still are today! In France, during Queen Marie's time; wild orgies were the norm, until she lost her head for being a Taker instead of a Giver! Just maybe, that was then people started to assume that when you lost you head over sex it was dangerous or wrong!

In the recent past, we had many free thinkers, who were outspoken about their belief in their right to enjoy their sexuality. It is also well known that many of our world leaders -- even those of the religious community have openly or secretly enjoyed their sexuality while trying to deny us the same rights and opportunities.

Old Ben Franklin was known to be a free thinker and nudist, while enjoying his sexuality in a manner we would call swinging. In fact, in today's moral mud slinging climate, this brilliant statesman would not be allowed to hold any Government offices of positions he held. The moral majority today, would've hung him out to dry, just as they did Gary Hart!!! Today, people are only considered worthy of being world leaders if they can almost be considered for sainthood!!! In many cases it's just that they have been sneaky or secretive enough to keep their true natures from being known.

Many of our movie stars are known for the sexual games they play, on and off screen, but most people just laugh and secretly envy them and talk badly about their neighbors if they are acting in a similar manner. It is normal for people to hate, deride, and judge anyone who has claimed their right to enjoy their sexuality in any manner they have chose not to regardless of their own hidden desires!!!

In the last twenty years, some sexual rights were established in the courts of the land, proving the fact, a persons sexuality should be their own business. But in the last five years, many of these same rights have received a battering by the vocal moral majority!!! It's just not our business anymore, what we do in the privacy of our homes and bedrooms. It has become the business of the federal state and local governments organized religions and even your next door neighbor! The swinging lifestyle, as we know it today; has evolved, grown and changed during the last 60 years. My parents were approached, when I was just a baby; to go to small home parties involving wife swapping with many of their neighbors and good friends. Most of them belonged to a very restrictive religion, which considered divorce a sin. so as a way to keep their vow, "Till death do us part" -- they had decided to forget about "cleave unto each other only!!" Daddy naturally thought it was a great idea, but Mom objected and thought she had refused it for both of the, but Daddy claimed all his sexual rights without her.

For many years, the small Home Party situations was the only way people enjoyed swinging and they were restricted to couples only. This was a very much mail-dominated society at that time, so it was definitely considered wife swapping. The attitude was: you can swing with my wife, it I can swing with your's? It's a fact, many people & clubs haven't progressed past this restrictive attitude today! Only for the last few years, have some clubs allowed Female or Male singles.
Organized On & Off Premise Swing Clubs have only come into being during the last 0-20 years, being modeled after Sandstone; an alternative lifestyle community in California The video they produced is still being rented in many local video stores, but this Style setting club today, denies being part of the Swinging Community?!!

Today, on & off premise swing clubs are in most states and countries of the world. The National Association, formed by Club Owners and Swing Magazine Publishers;, host many widely varied functions: Conventions, Camp-outs, Cruises, Tours and Fun Weekends. These give everyone a change to meet, exchange information a large number of subjects, especially any laws or medical concerns, which may affect people's ability and right to enjoy their sexuality and the swinging lifestyle.

When a person attends these functions, they are able to learn that the majority of the participants are definitely not the Dregs of the Universe, as the general public has been led to believe they are? In fact, just the opposite is true!!! The swinging lifestyle is only 10-20% as they've been depicted by the media, while the higher majority of them are highly intelligent, successful, community leaders and almost always the type of person you would love to have for a friend or neighbor. They're the lovers of the universe, showing love, consideration and caring. They only want to be left alone to enjoy their friends, as they each desire!

They believe in their right to enjoy their sexuality, in private, in their own homes or organized swing clubs, plus grant their mates, other people, their sexual rights too. They learn how to show love to themselves and to their friends. They're secure in their personal lives and in their sexuality, so they don't feel the need to try to control anyone else's lives or sexuality. They have a natural outlet for their sexual desires, with consenting adults, so are less likely to inflict them on their own children or any unwilling victims.

Committed couples, who have acknowledged themselves as swingers and have come into the swinging lifestyle, so they may act as each others best friend and continue to have totally truthful relationships, rather than lie to each other and have secret affairs. I personally consider it strange that the people in our world today are more understanding of secret affairs, than they are an alternate lifestyle that advocates, demands and requires total truth!!!

Non-swingers are enjoying their sexuality, just as swingers are except they are lying to their mate's about it and deliberately making their marriages unhappy to justify their actions and soothe their guilt! They haven't learned that truth and honesty enables myou to not suffer emotional and infidelity or guilt!!

Only about 10% of the people enjoying the swinging lifestyle have mentally and emotionally accepted their sexuality enough to be completely open about being involved in it! Some try to keep this fact secret due to the fears about how this knowledge would affect their lives, family relationships and careers. While other's hide the truth because they refuse to admit even to themselves they are swingers. This is why many don't attend organized clubs. They try to tell themselves that as long as they only to go small home parties with friends, they are not really swingers!!!

The couples who have been able to admit, they enjoy the swinging lifestyle, attend the major functions the lifestyle offers. This helps them to grow, learn and get past their fears, while the closet swinger has denied themselves this opportunity due to their fear.

If I could sum up, what the swinging lifestyle really is and isn't, I would have to say that depends totally upon the needs, desired and attitudes of each individual who enters it. If you desire only more and better opportunities for sex that's possible! If you lonely and want good friends too, who will love and car about you while you enjoy going to dinner, dancing, camping and Fishing, that is possible! If you want to meet people from all over the world to visit and visit you, that is possible!!! So just as in every other facet of life, swinging is what you make of it, nothing more, or nothing less.

SHIRLEY SEZ: ... WE ARE NOT DOING ANYTHING NEW OR DIFFERENTWE ARE JUST DOING IT BETTER!!!

Dream Pleasure Tours Teams with "Wild on E!"

Dream Pleasure Tours Teams With "Wild on E!"

For Ms. No Swim Suit Contest

NEWPORT BEACH, CALIFORNIA, February 19, 2008 - Dream Pleasure Tours announced today that it is partnering with E! Networks and Tom's Tours for the filming of the 2008 Ms. No Swim Suit Contest.

From March 9 to March 15, 2008 the Ms. No Swim Suit contest is being held at the fabulous Hedonism II Resort located at the tip of famous Negril Beach, Jamaica, considered to be one of the world's premier warm water vacation destinations. Twelve dynamic female contestants representing social clubs and travel organizations from around the U.S. vie for the 2008 Ms. No Swim Suit crown.

Unlike conventional pageants in which a panel of stuffy biased judges pick the winner, at the Ms. No Swim Suit Contest everyone vacationing at the resort may cast their ballot for the lady of their choice. Consequently the entire week is filled with activities designed to allow the lovely contestants to win the favor of visitors, including Naughty School Girl Night, the evening Bareware Competition, the Naked Fashion Show, Pajama Night, Mardi Gras Night, Toga Party Night, and the Dance Finale. At this pageant, flirting with the judges is not only accepted, it's encouraged!

Gary Booth, director of communications and club/resort relations for Dream Pleasure Tours, said, "If you've never been to any of the Hedonism resorts-well it's all in the name so expect an experience unlike anything you've ever had. With a location like this, and an event like the Ms. No Swim Suit contest, it was bound to attract media attention. And it did! E! Network's hot show "Wild on E!" will be on location shooting all the action. If you can't get down to the resort for this once a year event, check it out on E!-but remember, put the kids to bed first! When we say 'No Swim Suit' we meant it."

Hedonism II and its group of affiliated resorts, known as SuperClubs®, along with Tom's Tours have been staging the Ms. No Swim Suit Contest since 2000. Hedonism II is an all inclusive up scale resort that caters to those vacationers looking for the ultimate in pleasure. From the moment Hedonism II's gates opened twenty-five years ago, it's been the most widely recognized, and notorious, resort in the world. Words really can't quite describe the thrill of actually being there. It's the ultimate guilty pleasure, only without the guilt. A real life Garden of Eden. Tom's Tours specializes in vacations to adult oriented travel destinations.

About Dream Pleasure Tours

Dream Pleasure Tours is as an event and tour company specializing in tours and events that are designed to entice the senses and stimulate our guest's deepest desires. Our guests are seeking to combine the ambience of luxury with the enchantment of a dreamscape. They throw off the constraints of everyday life and enter a world unlike anything they've ever experienced. Setting passion and sensuality free they leave the labels behind. Dream Pleasure Tours-making fantasy a reality for open minded fun loving people. To find out more about Dream Pleasure Tours, visit us at http://www.dreampleasuretours.com/ or call 888-662-1522.

Snappy Answers: Swingers Sex and Sexy Drinks

Snappy Answers runs every Saturday afternoon. Send your questions, be they tough or trivial, to snappyanswers@torontoist.com.

At work the other day a co-worker stated he was off to Club Wicked. Can you tell me how they get away with "sex" in that club? I understand he stated it was because it is registered as a "private club" but would like to know more.
I'm sure one of your "roving reporters" would love to take this on!
—SL

Dear SL,
They get away with it, quite simply, because it's legal. In 2005, the Supreme Court ruled that since consensual sex in a private club does no harm to Canadian society, it should not be considered criminal. (Your wife, however, may feel differently.)

If you'd like to know more about the actual "sex" in this "private club" (which, incidentally, is Ontario's only on-premise swingers establishment), we suggest you do your own "roving." If you're a single guy, you'll have to bring a female date—preferably not a first date, as that might end in a very early goodnight slap.

Swinger's News Headlines

Swingers converging on Niagara Falls (click here for more details)

cnews.canoe.ca — Sexyboots, as she prefers to be called, admits she will be committing adultery in Niagara Falls this weekend.

An interview with swinger (read more)

How long have you been swingers? GIRL: Well, it was really early, actually. GUY: Yeah, I don't think we were dating more than three months before we had a threesome. And even then, it wasn't awkward. We brought up the idea kind of as a ...

Fire Marshal Calls Alleged Lenoir Swingers Club A Death TrapWSOCtv.com (read more) -

Charlotte,NC,USALENOIR, NC -- A suspected swingers club in Lenoir may be shut down for some time after the building that houses it failed a fire inspection on 24 violations ...

Swingers are regular people too

By MATTHEW TIMMERMAN
2/10/2008 -

To each their own, that’s what I was taught by my elders when growing up. When others begin to attempt to take away your own right to express yourself, that’s when you take up arms.

Where would our country be if our neighbors tried to keep tabs about what we did and how we did it? By now if you don’t know what I’m writing about, you haven’t been keeping up with the latest in local news.

All too often lately when I open up my morning paper, I’m bombarded with news about “The Badd Kitty Club” and the “crusade” to remove the “filth” from the town of Sheridan, where I personally was raised all my life. I couldn’t help but notice the neighbor’s claims such as fearing for the safety of her child around “those people” and her property value going down. I’d personally like to ask a few questions about these claims and make a few things publicly known.

First of all, I’d like to let it be known that I am not a swinger by any means, but I do support the right to their own lifestyle just as anyone else. Now to the neighbor, if I may address your concerns: You say you’re worried about your child’s safety with “those people” around. I do believe you compared the swinger lifestyle to pedophiles, which I find to be a disturbing, disgusting and a plain ignorant statement. If you’re worried about your child being abducted and exploited in the club, last I knew, capable parents shouldn’t let their children outside to play at 9 or 10 o’clock a night, when the Badd Kitty Club’s parties start for the most part. Next, about your property values dropping because of a club next to your house, let me ask, what would you do if it were a different alternative lifestyle club next door to you such as a lesbian club? Well, you probably wouldn’t have to worry about your son being abducted and sexually abused. Would you campaign against them and say you don’t want “those people” next door to your house? Are you really so closed-minded that you brand anything you don’t agree with “smut” and “disgusting?”

Swingers have been around for longer than you probably assume. Just because the club caters to swingers, doesn’t mean it’s any different than Mr. And Mrs. John and Jane Doe, the 40-year-old couple down the street who throw swingers parties without your knowledge.

As for the signs on your front yard, I noticed that you have erected a new sign and placed it on a tree.

You’re worried about “the club” taking your property value down the tubes, yet you have poorly made signs, basically taking cheap shots at nice, undeserving people who do something you just so happen not to agree with. How ironic is that? I personally think you need to take a good long look at what you’re doing and wonder “why am I doing this.” Are you doing it for your personal fame or are you doing it to give the club even more free publicity? A crusade? I call it defamation, slander and all around mudslinging.

Remember, I’m not telling you anything you already didn’t know.

Matthew Timmerman is a Sheridan resident.

Christian Sexual Conflicts Traditional Christianityvs. "The Faith Of Christ"

Christian Sexual Conflicts Traditional Christianityvs. "The Faith Of Christ"
By Bill

"Sex is dirty." - "Sex is wonderful."
"Sex is for marriage only."
"Children aren't sexual."
"Sexual thoughts and fantasies are sinful."
"Sex is an expression of love."
"Sex has nothing to do with 'Christian' love."

The above statements represent some of the many conflicting views about sexualitywith which most of us were raised.

You will recognize that the negative statements are the kind that are used by religionand society to control the sexual lives and attitudes of people. In other words,those who have power over others use such ideas to conform others to some moralstandard that is thought to be absolute. Traditional Christianity has used justsuch ideas for just such purposes.

Christ and the apostles taught that all power structures were to be challenged,not in the sense of political or social anarchy, but in the abolition of the controlof one person over another or any institution over groups of people in the senseof restricting God-given liberties. In these teachings there was an appeal fortransparency in human relationships. This transparency, which really implies bothvulnerability and trust, was to reveal itself in the common bonds of family andsocial relationships.

Jesus challenged both family and social relationship structures, suggesting thatfollowing him would break down traditional allegiances and create new ones.

Today we are seeing the serious breakdown of monogamous marriage and the traditionalnuclear family of European and North American cultures.

For the most part marriage and family practices and structures are the product ofculture, rather than of specific biblical teachings.

In other writings Dave and I have challenged the Christian tradition of monogamy. The breakdown I mentioned above suggests that the time has come for Christiansto seriously reconsider the entire range of marital and sexual teachings that havebeen handed down to us in traditional Christianity. It is time to realize, forexample, that monogamy has never really worked as an exclusive marital/sexual option(we've discussed reasons for this elsewhere) and to seek new structures and bondsthat will better express the vitality and creativity of sexual loving.

Monogamy and a host of other sexual restrictions are the products of a sexuallyrepressive Christianity.

How has this history of sexual repression come about? Various reasons, includingthe body/pleasure-negative traditions of some of the Greek thinkers of the timeof early Christianity, have contributed to this history. In addition, there hasbeen a tendency of Christians to turn the liberating teachings of Christ and theapostles into rules to obey and to be enforced by religious authorities (more powerstructure). The nature of these rules has also tended to reflect small errors ofinterpretation, misplaced emphasis or overemphasis on a particular teaching or aparticular aspect of a teaching and translation or interpretational errors stemmingfrom a moral bias (for example, the tendency to apply the term "porneia",usually translated "fornication" or "sexual immorality" in olderEnglish Bible versions, to every case of sexual intercourse outside of monogamousmarriage; the misinterpretation of the story of Adam and Eve as supporting monogamyand as teaching that nakedness is sinful; interpreting the biblical concepts ofpurity and holiness primarily as calling for abstinence from sexual "contamination").

With the passage of time these small errors and their resulting moralisms have continuallyincreased to the point that the fundamental teachings of Christ have often beenforgotten (for example, loving one another) and the minute and burdensome rulesof Christianity have won the day (for example, the extension of the idea of "fornication"to any kind of premarital sexual contact, from heavy petting to holding hands --really, this is actually frowned upon by some Christians; the sometimes organizedChristian opposition to social nudism --trying to close down nude beaches, etc.).

It is my contention that the general repression of sexuality and the repressionof nonmonogamous loving is not inherent in the Bible, nor was it the intention ofJesus and the apostles to be understood as teaching these views. Yet, it is truethat these ideas are part and parcel of the baggage of traditional Christianity,which has emphasized them to the neglect of love and liberty.

The French writer Jacques Ellul makes a helpful distinction between what he calls"Christianity" and "the faith of Christ". True Christianity(the faith of Christ) he defines as "the revelation and work of God accomplishedin Jesus Christ"; "the being of the church as the body of Christ"(as opposed to the church as religious institution); and "the faith and lifeof Christians in truth and love".

Christianity as tradition he describes as a movement which has virtually abandonedits commitment to the above principles and has degenerated into a moralistic religion,devoid of true love for God and neighbor and obsessed with enforcing a moral codedemanding "chastity, absolute obedience... (and) sacrifice". (The Subversionof Christianity, pp. 11, 17)

It is this perverted version of Christianity which imprisons people in guilt andshame about their bodies and their God-given sexual desires. (This is not to saythat there is no such thing as sexual sin or that we are given license to do anythingwe please at anytime and with anyone in terms of fulfilling sexual desires. Itis to say that Christian love, properly understood, will both live freely in termsof sexual loving and at the same time respect all persons in their relationships,so that fulfillment is accomplished without harming others.) This is not the Christianityof the Bible, that is, the Christianity that Ellul calls "the faith of Christ".

The purpose of Jesus in his life and death was to enable us to fulfill the demandsof the law of God, not by sacrifice and legalistic obedience, but by loving Godand loving our neighbor.

I believe that it is in the intimacy of sexual relationships where this kind oflove can be expressed in a very full way. One of the greatest deformities of trueChristian faith is the collection of teachings that seeks in every way possibleto remove godly love from the sexual experience.

Contrary to this is the simple, yet beautiful, statement of a Christians brotherwho is involved with his family in a sexually loving community in another state:"We believe that sharing sexual pleasure with one another is an extension ofthe love of almighty God."

Obviously, such sharing presents the problem or vulnerability -- the challenge ofopening ourselves to others. Many people are afraid of such openness. I believethat it is only within a loving, caring community, manifesting the kind of lovethat Jesus taught, that sufficient trust can be created to make truly "open"relationships possible.

In a recent newsletter Dave wrote extensively about nudity and that subject wasalso discussed at our first introductory couples' session. It was clear from theresponse at the session that several people were fearful of experiencing nuditywith others. There may be various reasons for such fears, including past religiousand parental teachings and attitudes. These may need to be worked through. ButI believe that the primary issue with nudity is the same as that for sexual openness--vulnerability.

Overcoming this problem in a loving fellowship setting can change a person's lifein a major way -- in terms of body shame and guilt as well as being a preparationfor sexual openness. This is why we emphasize nudity in our materials and groupsession discussions.

The elements of fear and distrust are very significant in terms of all aspects ofthe religious and cultural attitudes toward sexuality.

In other writings Dave and I have discussed how various attitudes and beliefs ofancient peoples have contributed to the understanding of sexuality that is presentin modern Christianity. Much of the content of the sexual belief systems of ancientpeoples derived from superstition, born of ignorance of the working of the humanbody and psyche. The ideas of conception, pregnancy and childbirth were regardedwith a mixture of fear, awe and even worship. The phenomenon of human fertilityand the mystery of sexual bonding were likewise sources of superstitious wonderand little or no practical understanding. Without birth control it had to be assumedthat sexual intercourse would result in pregnancy. All of these elements of lifewere viewed in almost magical ways and indeed witch doctors, soothsayers and thelike were often involved in ritual practices associated with sexual events.

(It might be observed at this point that the availability of many near-foolproofmethods of birth control today opens the way to much greater sexual freedom in generaland should make possible some of the restructuring of marriage and family modelsmentioned earlier. It is worth noting that such restructuring on this basis wouldnot have been possible in the ancient world and indeed would not have been feasibleuntil very recent times. It seems to me that practical/scientific developmentssuch as safe, reliable contraception should make the church rethink the possibilitiesof sexual behavior and patterns. I believe that alert and aware Christians havethe opportunity to explore new and exciting options in these areas.)

It happened that Christianity was born in a culture in which these views of sexualitywere common. Thus, all of Christianity's sexual teachings have been compromisedby such views, almost to the point of continuing to treat sexual phenomena as magical,thus calling for the many controlling taboos.

Today we know that sex is not magic. It may be awe-inspiring, exciting, confusingand even properly regarded as containing elements of mystery. It may be the mostemotionally meaningful aspect of human life. But it is not magic and should notbe treated with the fear and taboos of the past. I believe that traditional Christianityperpetuates these outdated views and we must work to rid ourselves of them in thefellowship of Christian love.

It is these old views that lead to the emotional/spiritual abuse for which manypeople reject this version of Christianity. These views are not characteristic ofwhat Jacques Ellul calls "the faith of Christ".

It is our hope in Liberated Christians that this kind of faith can set us free tolove freely, joyfully and responsibly the way we believe God has made us to love.

'Older sex workers going hungry'

'Older sex workers going hungry'By SALLY FRENCH - Manukau Courier

Tuesday, 05 February 2008

BEN CAMPBELL/Manukau Courier

CONCERNED: Mamatere Strickland is worried about the growing number of underage prostitutes working in south Auckland.

Underage prostitutes are forcing experienced sex workers to go home hungry.

The young girls are taking business away from women who have been working the streets for years, says the Papatoetoe agency that helps prostitutes over 18 who want to leave the sex industry.

Te Aronga Hou Inaianei co-founder Mamatere Strickland says she has had to ask the Salvation Army to get food parcels for mothers who haven’t "had any luck" because of the number of young girls working.

"It’s a supply and demand issue. The younger the supply, the more competition for the older girls," the former sex worker says.

"I guess part of that mentality is the younger they are, the less likely they are to have infections.
"Older women are going home with nothing. It’s been a sad Christmas for many of them – the competition is just getting too much."

A sting by Counties Manukau police in the past month resulted in 25 men being arrested for buying sex from underage prostitutes.

Fifteen street workers, some as young as 13, were taken off the streets during Operation Capio.
Mamatere says the number of underage prostitutes is rising because of the Prostitution Reform Act. "The act has taken police resources off the street and has therefore sent the message to pimps and gangs that there are opportunities to get away with things," she says.

Underage prostitutes don’t dress up in high-heels, fishnet stockings and miniskirts, she says. The girls wear their normal clothing but punters know they are working because they frequent red-light areas after midnight.

She and her team give out condoms and information packs with guidelines on how to keep safe while working on the street.

Prostitutes are also helped with housing and budgeting advice and are encouraged to seek other employment or take part in educational training courses.

Those who want help for their addictions are referred to drug and alcohol services.
Poverty has a role to play in underage prostitution, Mamatere says.

"People are quick to blame the families, but hang on a minute, we’ve got other influences out there impacting on the children.

"P and other drugs also turn family against family and a lot of loving families out there would be broken-hearted to see that their child has gone down this road to destruction."

But the problem won’t be solved by police removing underage prostitutes from the street.
"It’s not about moving them on. It’s about looking at the social, holistic approach to what’s happening and trying to make change.

"Getting the police to arrest them doesn’t solve the problem, they’ll just come back the next night.

"I don’t know why the government didn’t listen when we tried to tell them what would happen.
"Now we’ve got an epidemic on our hands."

She hopes Operation Capio will let people know south Auckland is not a paedophile haven for men picking up "our" children.

Swinging's their thing...

By MIKE STROBEL
Wed, February 6, 2008
Swinging's their thing ...

We should all pile in the family wagon and see what the heck is going on down in Viagra, I mean Niagara, Falls.

The Cheese Capital of Canada never fails to amaze.

Where else in the world can you imagine a daredevil in a barrel surviving the plunge only to drown in a heart-shaped bathtub?

Where else are wax figures and whack-a-moles the biggest ethnic groups?

Where else could an army of swingers, and I don't mean Tarzan, take over a major hotel and convention centre?

Charles Blondin, meet Sexyboots.

Both acrobats, but in different ways.

Blondin walked a tightrope across the Falls.

Sexyboots, well, she just walks a tightrope.

"There's a fine line between love and lust," she tells me down the line from her home in Barrie.

"I can love my husband, but lust after someone else."

And vice versa.

Sexyboots is not her real name.

"We're where gays were 50 years ago, when if you admitted it, your career and family and social life were ruined." So, Sexyboots it is. Let me guess.

"It'd be obvious if you saw me in a club," she says. "I have a large collection of 'hooker boots.' "
I hope the carpets at a certain Niagara Falls hotel are up to the challenge.

Two hundred couples will convene for a Valentine's Day weekend called Take A Bite Of The Apple (TABOTA).

This is not for the faint of heart.

The exact location is hush-hush.

(I'm sworn. But it's not Motel Sex ... um, Six.)

And single men are NOT welcome.

"It may seem like a double standard," says Sexyboots, 37, "but we find single men far too pushy. A lot of couples don't like that. They feel pressured.

"There's also the 'creep' factor. They're single for a reason."

By the by, don't call it "wife-swapping" or risk a face-slapping.

"Swinging" is still okay, but "The Lifestyle" and "lifestyler" are preferred. Rita DeMontis will be tickled, I'm sure.

The bumph from TABOTA organizers says this is the first hotel "takeover" by swingers in Canada.

A Super Bowl of group sex, with teams from the many clubs that dot Ontario, even bedroom communities like Barrie.

"A whole hotel works better," says Sexyboots. "Otherwise you might have a floor of swingers next to a floor of peewee hockey players.

"What I do in my bedroom is my business, but I have no right to expose my lifestyle to others.
"We won't be making out in the halls."

Mind you, the promo does promise "a hedonistic and sexually charged atmosphere."
Seminars include erotic photography and tantric sex.

The pool parties, speed-dating and theme dances sound like fun.

So do the group sex and bondage rooms. Gives "smoking floor" a whole new meaning.

Sexyboots will be there with her hubby, a computer guy who goes by Mr. Boots.

They were college sweethearts and have two kids.

She works for Queen's Park.

Five years ago, after he'd been hinting for months, she said, "Let's do it," and they went to a swingers' Halloween party dressed in army fatigues.

Isn't this adultery, Sexyboots?

"My definition of cheating is doing it behind your spouse's back.

"But I'm not. He's right there with me."

"Playing," swingers call it. As in: Listen, I'll play with Buffy over there, you play with Lars and Sven, and later we'll play Simon Says with Bob and Carol and Ted and Alice, play a little Flying Burrito Brothers on the hi-fi and if we have any energy left, maybe play some Scrabble.

As the promo says: "What do committed couples do to relieve the seven-year itch? Scratch it together!!"

"Wha...?!" says Niagara Falls Mayor Ted Salci, just back from a chili cook-off.
Your honour, that's a real swingin' town you got down there.

"This is the first I've heard of it." He laughs.

"They're local people!?"

From all over. The hotel's not exactly broadcasting it.

"If they're law-abiding, I suppose it's fine."

Even in a God-fearing place like the Falls?

"Well, I won't be cutting any ribbons for them."

Too bad. There goes the swing vote.

Let's Visit A Swinger's Party

So here we are. It’s the Halloween Bash at Club H and the place is packed. There are at least 300 people here and the atmosphere is hauntingly sensuous!!! A hand taps me on the shoulder - as I turn around my eyes are fixated on a lovely woman dressed in a tight catsuit “trick or treat!” she purrs. Oh how I wanted to give her a piece of my “candy”!!! Well, I settled for buying a drink for her and her husband.

As we sat down and began to converse, I found out it was their second Club H party. “We were so nervous when we were here the first time, but it only took a little while before we felt right at home” she went on to say. “Oh, I’m sorry, my name is Cathy and this is Mark. Mark, a tall gentleman with shoulder length hair and old fashioned shyness, smiled, stood up and shook my hand. “Ya know, even if we never party, just being here and feeling so free is taking me away from my shyness... as you can guess, Cathy is more outgoing than I am.” As we continued to converse, I found out that Mark and Cathy had initially been looking for a single female, but have since changed their sights to meet with a couple. “I think I am ready now” Mark said, I felt a little self conscious and wondered if we would be what people are looking for”. I thought “what a nice, genuine couple”, then I looked at his broad shoulders and deep brown eyes and said “I don’t think you’ll have a problem”. Mark said, “We discussed this all week and we plan to look for a couple (or two) to meet for dinner with next week. Of course, with all the after parties going on after the dance, we are ready to go for it”!!! Our conversation continued until a couple whom they obviously met before came up and began to exchange wet kisses. I thought I’d walk, I was getting excited!!!

I walked around and gazed at the dance floor... ooooooh!!! the Ladies Dance! Ladies were already up close and personal. A Ladies Dance Chain was building quickly with hot grinding, rubbing and bouncing! I stopped to watch... (wouldn’t you???).

As the music faded into a slow song I saw people make their way to the dance floor for a little “bump and grind”. In the far corner, I saw a crowd that seemed to be very “enthusiastic”. Time to take a walk!

As I reached over, I saw what the enthusiasm was all about... There were two couples who had been out of town for about 6 months... people were welcoming them back!! The hugs, kisses and “We missed you” were so warm and genuine that I walked up to them and said “This is Terrific!!!” The group laughed and introduced themselves. What I found so fun, was that even though they did not know me, I was welcomed, invited to sit down and even given a glass of champagne!!! Definitely a friendly party!!!

I was again watching the dance floor and I quickly spun around to go to the restroom. That’s when I bumped into Toni. The embarrassing part was that my hand brushed her left breast. She gave me a wide, sensuous smile and said “Now you have to do the same thing to the right one... they get jealous, you know.” Now I am blushing. Toni is clad in leather and I would bend over for her anytime!!! She shook my hand, gave me a hug and walked me over to introduce me to her husband Glen, who was in deep conversation with another new couple that had lot’s of questions. I said a brief hello and walked around with Toni.

People walked up to her, hugged, kissed, (there was a lot of that) and talked, invited her and Glen to an after party, drinks, etc. Many people just came up to say what a great job they were doing with the Club.

The DJs were working everyone into a frenzy now. This is definitely the most fun you can have with your clothes on! The costumes were delectable, sensuous, scary and downright erotic!!! It was the Best Costume Contest and it was obvious that Club H members were as creative as they were horny!!! Ghouls, goblins, slinky witches, angelic vixens, even Little Bo Peep!!!

Couples and groups were pairing up, making party plans and exchanging phone numbers. It looks like a wild evening is in the works. I’ve got several parties to go to myself!!!

Halloween (and any other nite) at Club H is hot, sensuous and filled with fun, friendly people who want to party! We plan to be back for the Halloween Bash - join us!!

The 10 Commandments of Swinging!

1. Never attempt to break up a marriage.



2. Always keep dates unless you give ample notice of changing circumstances.



3. Always keep the first meeting on a "no strings attached" basis, but be prepared to swing if it is mutually agreeable or to give an honest answer if something doesn't click.



4. Never, under any circumstances exert pressure on a partner to swing.



5. Restrict discussions of swinging to known swingers and interested persons seeking information.



6. Protect the anonymity of other swingers by refraining from unauthorized "name dropping."



7. Always maintain the highest standards of personal cleanliness and appearance.



8. Do not engage in any unlawful activity that would discredit swingers as a group.



9. Be friendly and warm with your swing partners, but understand that there is a type of emotional involvement, which is properly reserved for a spouse or "primary significant other."



10. Always show respect for the personal attitudes, feelings and "hang-ups" of other swingers.

Are You A Swinger?

Are you a Swinger?

by http://www.thirdpath.com/articles.htm

The date…1971 you walk into a room of people dressed in tight mini skirts and polyester leisure suits. The gold chains around the neck while showing off their hairy chests, point out how cool they really are. If they are lucky, they will end the evening “swapping” and going home with another persons spouse… Is this you? Chances are, this is the image that most of us, along with the general public, have imbedded in our minds about what swingers are like.

Welcome to 2003! Who are today’s Swingers? Would you believe that Vice Presidents of major corporations, Politicians, Teachers and even Clergy are sharing their most intimate relationships? People that may have just met on the Internet or in person, thanks to thousands of swing clubs, private house parties and personal magazine ads, many are taking the average friendship and going the next step. Some are even meeting at the work place or college dorms.

The big difference now is that it is no longer a lifestyle set aside for dark hidden bars in the tucked away shadows of the inner cities. Lost with this are the Gold chains, Miniskirts and Polyester leisure suits. Amen!

Through our 10 years of observing and/or counseling over 5000 couples within the alternative lifestyles…we have noticed the following:

- Most are middle to upper income

- Most have college educations

- Most have chosen this lifestyle to enhance (Not substitute) their primary relationship.

- Most have very stable and secure primary relationships and would not consider cheating on their significant other…or have the need.

- Almost all are very considerate of others wishes and needs and know what “no thank you” means

- Almost all take major precautions to prevent sexually transmitted diseases.

- We find that a major percentage (better than 80%) are NON-smokers.

- Swingers tend to take care of their bodies more than non-swingers, but than again…this lifestyle is like dating.

- Surprisingly enough over 90% of all women are bi-sexual or bi-curious where only about 40% of the men are orally bi in any given group situation. (About 10% in a non group environment…one on one)

- We find the average age to be 34-40 contrast with the 70’s, the average age was more like 45-50.

What is swinging? Well lets start with the definition given by The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language (fourth edition. 2000), where a swinger is defined as “A person who engages freely in promiscuous sex” and/or “A member of a couple, especially a married couple, who exchanges sexual partners” After 10 years of counseling, educating and working with the “modern day swinger” a better stated definition would be:

“Any person or persons engaging in any form of sexual activity in the presents of any one or more individuals other than or in addition to his or her primary partner.” (as defined by Third Path)

We find that previous older definitions do not follow the modern approach of many within the swinging communities. The first and most obvious change in swinging is the fact that a very large percentage of swingers do not and never intend to “swap partners”. We have found that for many in the past, “swapping” was a means of satisfying something that was missing in the relationship that they were locked into. Many were unsatisfied with what they had, but did not want to divorce for reasons that varied from family values to religion. At the same time that this was occurring, many other non swingers were judging them for there sexual deviance even though consensual and in open of there partners. Meanwhile those judging were out cheating on their spouses as their means of satisfying themselves in their lacking relationship.

Today, at least 8 out of 10 couples are in this lifestyle for the “enhancement” of their relationship and NOT for the “replacement” of their relationship. Many couples are finding a new dimension to their already exciting sex life. Just because they are sharing sex with one or more individuals, that does not necessarily mean that they are having intercourse or even physical contact with these other individuals or couples. We find couples or individuals that simply share photos or enjoy the excitement of someone watching while they and their partner arouse each other to the point of total ecstasy and ultimately orgasm. Just the thought of their erection being shared visually by another couple getting aroused right next to them, even though there is no physical contact with anyone other than their primary partner, sends them into an orgasmic state that has not been experienced since their first sexual encounter with their own honey.

We find that there are many levels of swingers and to be definitive as possible, we have attempted to create a scale that might help you determine were you are and where you may want to be.

We call this scale, the “TP” Scale. Why “TP”? Well a TeePee is a circular shaped unit containing a cover, which tends to be flexible and doors that are not locked. Within the swinging environment, we tend to see “circles” or groups that tend to converge based upon common interests. When becoming part of a circle, we know where we are at the time, but as time goes on we may want the flexibility to change or expand circles to meet with our new and ever changing experiences. You might note that in most cases within your circle…the door is never locked. You may opt out of one circle and possibly enter another that is better suited for your new desires. Also note that a teepee looks like a triangle regardless of you view. This too explains the fact that in order to be a swinger…there must be at least a third party or direction aside from you and your primary partner. Hence “Third Path”, which is the Alternative Lifestyle counseling organization that originated this method of being able to share and understand where you and those around you fit and to what circle you belong or have a longing to belong. The following are the various levels of the TP Scale:

“TP” ONE SWINGER:

This is a couple that enjoys sharing sexuality at a safe distance such as over the phone or via e-mail. You may talk dirty and do things to each other by request of your “pen pal” couple or individual.

“TP” TWO SWINGER:

This is a couple that enjoys either being present and watching another couple or individual performs a sexual act or performing a sexual act while being watched or watching while being watched. Maybe you share a hotel room with two queen size beds right next to each other.

“TP” THREE SWINGER:

This is a couple that Has pre set rules and limits as to how far they will go with another couple or individual while sharing sexual activities. This will usually include touching outside of there primary partner. It may also include sexual massage licking and kissing…but never penetration. Usually at this level, a bond or friendship is the goal of all, and is usually not intended as a one-night stand.

“TP” FOUR SWINGER:

This is a couple set aside the rules and limits as to how far they will go with another couple or individual while sharing sexual activities. This will usually includes not only touching outside of there primary partner but, It may also include sexual massage licking and kissing and even intercourse. This grade is usually with an individual or couple that has created a common bond and attraction with the intention of an ongoing relationship and friendship.

“TP” FIVE SWINGER:

This is a couple that shares sexuality with another couple or individual to the extent that they do not have limits other than protection (condoms) as long as they are in the presents of there primary partner and usually sharing each other at the same time (threesomes or for sums). There is not expectation or obligation for long term friendships or relationships…just fun sex. This level, as in any of the levels, does not rule out the possibility of a long-term relationship between any or all of the parties involved.

“TP” SIX SWINGER:

At this level, a couple enjoys meeting people that want to have sex…Plane and simple. Attraction may or may not be important. Safety from disease is usually the only rule of thumb at this level…however, primary partners are still part of these encounters and even though they may have all the fun they want…the primaries always go home or to bed (to sleep) together.

“TP” SEVEN SWINGER:

The grade seven is no longer considered elementary swinging…this is the hard-core swap. I’ll take yours; you take mine…see you tomorrow. We find this a lot with “open relationships”. The hard part with this for of swinging is the Unknown factor of your primary. This is a topic of its own! However…there usually still needs to be somewhat of an attraction to the other individuals involved.

“TP” EIGHT SWINGER:

This is easy…any time, any where with (almost) anyone. If this is you…please be careful!
It is very important to note that even though the “TP” scale provides a base for not only determining where you are, and sharing with others were you are, but there are many variances to all of the “TP’s" above. You may find yourself somewhere in the middle. Remember…they are flexible!

So what about swinging in this society… as we are well aware, almost all religions and most social organizations, highly frown on any such activities…even though cheating is the most common cause of demise in a failed marriage…it’s almost considered “normal”. Many therapists can understand why one would cheat, but being a swinger is judged to be “BAD”! Well, at least according to our society. Contrast swinging, in which partners openly share their sexuality and expression of love in front of the one they call their primary partner, and you can see why swinging has changed and grown over the years. Imagine never cheating or having to lie to the one you love ever again! More and more couples are adding this new dimension to their intimate side of there relationship, while at the same time maintaining their conservative appearance in there work and residential community.

Maybe you have thought about what level of swinger you are…Maybe you’ve not thought about it to this level of detail. Either way, the “TP” Scale is one way for swingers to identify where their boundaries are and make it easier for other swingers to understand their relative experience and preference for involvement.

For further information or counseling on this, or other alternative lifestyles, please feel free to contact Judy J Emerson, PhD. and Nicholas Olevsky, DD.